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How often do you ask for help?

Just after I finished my 12 sessions of chemotherapy, I had one of the hardest weeks since my diagnosis.

I didn’t understand why…after all I had survived 12 sessions of chemotherapy right?

One of the nurses who had looked after me during my treatment told me on my last day – “Angelica, in 8 years of working in an oncology department, I have seen 4 people finishing this treatment. You have done really well!”

So that was something to be proud of right?

But I was lost…I wanted to shout to the world: do you realize what I have just gone through? 

But the world was going around like any other day…people were still busy living their own lives in the same way as they did before my cancer diagnosis…I was the one who needed to get back to normal but how could I?

A friend of mine who had had a good friend of hers going through the same cancer as I had texted me: “hey, this is probably going to be the hardest time in your journey. My friend really found hard to get back to normal, so focus on your husband and kids as my friend didn’t even have a family. You can do this! Take each day as it comes.”

I thought to myself – Shit – I need to get help.

I booked an appointment with a psychologist and I thought to myself, I have to reach out for help. I can’t do this alone anymore.

I had my first session and slowly my psychologist helped me to work through my pain, my wounds, my traumas…not in one many sessions…in fact I still see her, not as often but I see her and it is soooo helpful.

I faced my worst fears…things that I thought I would never be able to face…things I didn’t want to face….but remember I kept saying to myself I wanted to survive and I was going to do whatever it took to get back to feeling healthy, happy and healed.

I believe you can’t heal your body without healing your emotions, healing your heart. I have spoken to so many people who has gone through cancer treatment and they are left broken on the inside after it. They struggle through life after cancer because they didn’t look after their emotions, their inner healing.

If you have gone through something like cancer or any other wake up call, life interruption – whatever you want to call it, have you healed emotionally from it?

Have you stopped and acknowledged what you have gone through mentally or have you just gone back to normal life with a brave face?

I have actually made a video about emotional healing as I am super passionate about this:

If you know anyone who need to watch this video, forward this email to them…or the video link.

I feel we collect many “paper cuts” size wounds throughout life, at some point our bodies are full of them and we are in so much pain that we can’t take any more “paper cuts”. This is where I got and from where I healed….if I did it, you can do it too.

Stay safe! Stay healthy!

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Fighting the cancer, healing your soul

I spent this week listening to a “Global Cancer Symposium” online organised by Nathan Crane.

Still not sure how I came across him and or the Symposium but it has been amazing. There were 4 or 5 speakers daily for about 7 days and I think now you can buy the access if you like –

There were some amazing speakers talking about all the good things that are happening in the cancer world.

I was amazed by how much they spent talking about emotional healing as well as spirituality and spiritual healing.

Most of speakers have been in contact with cancer patients and cancer survivors stories from all around the world and mental healing kept coming up over and over again.

I then started thinking about my own cancer journey, specifically the emotional healing piece.

When I heard the words “You have cancer”, I knew it was about that. I felt deep down in my gut actually where exactly my cancer was that I needed to heal my inner world.

I hadn’t spoken to my family in years. I held so much anger and resentment inside me, that made me sick.

This is not a “poor me” statement or “why did I get cancer” statement at all.

Cancer has shown me that everybody goes through shit times in life and I wasn’t the only one.

Cancer showed me that I needed to change the way I look at things.

I needed to change me, not others, not what it had happened, not what it is happening neither what it will happen.

It is challenging though especially when it comes to family… but again I was committed because I knew this was the only path for healing. I was still desperately looking for ways to heal my body, mind and soul.

I am not going to say go and forget everybody in the world that upset you as I have healed all my wounds and forgave everyone. I am not going to say I live a perfect life now because that would be a lie.

What I would say though is be open to work on yourself, on your inner self.

I have certainly move forward, I opened my wounds up, I faced them even though it was painful and I was scared… I did it (my psychologist held my hand through it and still does it) and I am determined to keep working on it.

What about you? Have you thought about emotional healing or even what it is happening with your emotions, your inner world?

In a world that is moving far too fast, we are forgetting that our emotional state needs self care too.

I invite you to ask yourself if you are giving your emotional being enough attention or the attention it needs?

And if not why?