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I am not a meditator

I started meditating during chemotherapy.

Life was chaos…๐Ÿ˜ฉ

My thoughts were always racing…

I was so desperate to run away from my own reality like I had always done but this time I couldn’t…๐Ÿ˜ฌ

I had to stay put…

and sit with that diagnosis, chemo, going to doctors everyday…

I had to sit with fear…

and with myself…๐Ÿ™

All I could think about was…

๐™’๐™๐™–๐™ฉ ๐™˜๐™–๐™ฃ ๐™„ ๐™™๐™ค ๐™ฉ๐™ค ๐™ž๐™ข๐™ฅ๐™ง๐™ค๐™ซ๐™š ๐™ข๐™ฎ ๐™˜๐™๐™–๐™ฃ๐™˜๐™š๐™จ ๐™ค๐™› ๐™จ๐™ช๐™ง๐™ซ๐™ž๐™ซ๐™–๐™ก?

๐™„ ๐™ฃ๐™š๐™š๐™™ ๐™ฉ๐™ค ๐™จ๐™ช๐™ง๐™ซ๐™ž๐™ซ๐™š ๐™›๐™ค๐™ง ๐™ข๐™ฎ ๐™ ๐™ž๐™™๐™จ…

Meditation was one of the things I took on…

It felt so pointless at the beginning…๐Ÿ˜ฅ

My thoughts were so crazy…

But I am stubborn as hell so I stuck to it…

Day in day out

Starting with 5-10 minutes

Then to 20 minutes

After one year of meditating daily, I went on holidays to Europe for one month.

I was determined to exercise daily as this was also part of my plan to stay alive…

I thought to myself…

If I can’t meditate in that month, I will pick it up when I get back.

I spend a whole month not meditating and I started to feel how meditation had changed me

Sometimes it takes you to loose something for you to value it

๐˜”๐˜บ ๐˜ข๐˜ฃ๐˜ช๐˜ญ๐˜ช๐˜ต๐˜บ ๐˜ต๐˜ฐ ๐˜ฃ๐˜ณ๐˜ช๐˜ฏ๐˜จ ๐˜ฎ๐˜บ ๐˜ข๐˜ต๐˜ต๐˜ฆ๐˜ฏ๐˜ต๐˜ช๐˜ฐ๐˜ฏ ๐˜ต๐˜ฐ ๐˜ต๐˜ฉ๐˜ฆ ๐˜ฑ๐˜ณ๐˜ฆ๐˜ด๐˜ฆ๐˜ฏ๐˜ต ๐˜ฎ๐˜ฐ๐˜ฎ๐˜ฆ๐˜ฏ๐˜ต ๐˜ญ๐˜ฆ๐˜ด๐˜ด๐˜ฆ๐˜ฏ ๐˜ช๐˜ฏ ๐˜ต๐˜ฉ๐˜ข๐˜ต ๐˜ฎ๐˜ฐ๐˜ฏ๐˜ต๐˜ฉ

๐˜ ๐˜ด๐˜ต๐˜ข๐˜ณ๐˜ต๐˜ฆ๐˜ฅ ๐˜จ๐˜ฆ๐˜ต๐˜ต๐˜ช๐˜ฏ๐˜จ ๐˜ฃ๐˜ข๐˜ค๐˜ฌ ๐˜ต๐˜ฐ ๐˜ฃ๐˜ฆ๐˜ช๐˜ฏ๐˜จ ๐˜ฎ๐˜ฐ๐˜ณ๐˜ฆ ๐˜ช๐˜ฎ๐˜ฑ๐˜ข๐˜ต๐˜ช๐˜ฆ๐˜ฏ๐˜ต ๐˜ธ๐˜ช๐˜ต๐˜ฉ ๐˜ฎ๐˜บ ๐˜ฌ๐˜ช๐˜ฅ๐˜ด ๐˜ง๐˜ฐ๐˜ณ ๐˜ญ๐˜ช๐˜ต๐˜ต๐˜ญ๐˜ฆ ๐˜ต๐˜ฉ๐˜ช๐˜ฏ๐˜จ๐˜ด

๐˜ ๐˜ง๐˜ฆ๐˜ญ๐˜ต ๐˜ต๐˜ฉ๐˜ฆ ๐˜ด๐˜ต๐˜ณ๐˜ฆ๐˜ด๐˜ด๐˜ฆ๐˜ด ๐˜ฐ๐˜ง ๐˜ญ๐˜ช๐˜ง๐˜ฆ ๐˜จ๐˜ฆ๐˜ต๐˜ต๐˜ช๐˜ฏ๐˜จ ๐˜ฐ๐˜ฏ ๐˜ต๐˜ฐ๐˜ฑ ๐˜ฐ๐˜ง ๐˜ฎ๐˜ฆ

In that month I understood how important was for me to meditate.

Needless to say, I came back from holidays and I have meditate daily since then (3 years on)

If you haven’t tried meditation or you may think you are not a meditator…(because I can tell you I am still not one)

๐Ÿ‘‰๐ŸผLet go of the expectations of what you should do or be while meditating
๐Ÿ‘‰๐ŸผThink as meditation as a time that you just quieten your mind (softer approach)
๐Ÿ‘‰๐ŸผKeep at it as like anything you only get results when you are consistent

PS: I am a using a Muse device here which is a great help when you are starting.

If you don’t know what a muse is, it is a device that helps you with your meditation practice as it gives you real-time feedback on your mind and body.

It measures your brain waves and heart beat and gives you real feedback to empower you to manage your response on your meditation practice.

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